We all have the right to have different reasons for celebrating or not celebrating this season. You may choose to feel peace or joy or anger or depression at this time of year. I choose to feel good right now along with many other people. I like to greet people or they like to greet me with “Happy Holidays” or “Merry Christmas” so I am going to say, “Have a Blessed Holiday”, to you.
Freedom of speech is a two-way street. It does not protect just one kind of belief. It was ordained to protect the rights for all Americans, not just the Politically Correct (PC) ones. Have we forgotten that?
The American Civil Liberties Union has a strong bias in terms of what freedoms they will protect and they often protect one group’s freedoms and take away the freedoms of another group with an opposite or opposing point of view.
It seems like the American Civil Liberties Union is operating like the PC police and many people who are afraid of being taken to court by them will not say anything although it needs to be said.
When it becomes a war on Christmas, it takes all the merriment, fun, and joy out of celebrating it. I am noticing that stores are not decorating for Christmas as usual. I miss it. Yet, the stores still want people to buy Christmas gifts and decorations, religious or not.
There is a lot of paranoia about celebrating Christmas the old-fashioned way. It is a tradition in the United States of America. Now it seems like people are bending over backwards to facilitate celebrating the religious holidays of other religions.
There are a lot of Muslim converts in prisons forcing prisons to make changes (for example) in the diets of prisoners who are not Muslim. I don’t know if they purchase Kosher food and have special kitchens in which to prepare it for Orthodox Jews. Seventh Day Adventists also have diet restrictions which are part of their belief systems.
Now in our society, I can’t tell certain jokes either. We are not supposed to make fun of people who are different from us even though they might laugh too if they heard what we said. I make fun of myself and have a good sense of humor. I tell jokes about being disabled, being a “Red Neck,” and being just plain stupid sometimes.
What about all the silly Christmas songs? Will the American Civil Liberties Union come after them too.
Rest and Relaxation, Rules and Regulations, Rights and Responsibilities. Which one don’t we need? How about a vote?
My vote is for Rules and Regulations. They are something we can do without if we have established Rights and Responsibilities. Values and Morals are internal standards established by the soul to live in this world with other souls. Values and Morals generate what a soul considers to be individual rights and to be the accompanying responsibilities that go with having these rights.
Rules and Regulations are established only for people who do not have values and morals or who do not have the same values and morals and fight over them. A strong commitment to a set of rights (the amendments of the constitution) and responsibilities makes having rules and regulations almost unnecessary.
Rest and relaxation enable us to continue doing these things that we consider the right things to do. God established Sundays as a day of rest. A period of time when relaxation, not responsibilities, takes the fore front. We must care for ourselves like we care for others. For example, what good is an exhausted caregiver to the one who needs care? We also need a time to go over our values in life and to determine if we are still adhering to them.
We also used to be “on duty” when we were at work, not wasting time looking at social media (which we can do after work) or texting and at 5 P.M. we were off duty and free to see our friends and family and catch up on things at home as well as clean up and get a refreshing night’s sleep. Parents are not supposed to be “mystery people” who pick up and drop off children somewhere and bring them home only to sleep. Worse yet no one needs an exhausting commute to and from work or shift work that upsets a person’s internal clock.
You must be able to forgive yourself before you can forgive someone else. How can you conceive of the need to forgive somebody else when you can’t conceive of needing it yourself or worse yet being able to offer it to others. You have to know and understand that all of us have done some things for which we need to be forgiven and it may be easier to offer it to others than it is to offer it to ourselves. Are you hard on yourself and while you may not be the Holiest person in the world, might you not be capable of having the title of being the most unforgiveable person in the world. How self-sacrificing to offer to someone else what you, yourself, feel that you don’t deserve. Then and only then can you relate to the need to forgive someone else. When it comes to forgiveness, we all need it and realizing that we ourselves need it, we realize what it means to extend that to someone else besides ourselves.
Now there is another side to the story. Some people feel very good about offering forgiveness to others when they think that they don’t need it themselves. It can come from a “holier than thou” attitude. These people can’t conceive of the need to forgive themselves even though they are happy to offer it to others. Doing this shows how much better off they are than the other people whom they need to forgive. “Who me?” “I don’t need to forgive myself. The fact that I can forgive others proves that I don’t need to be forgiven myself.”
The point to this story is that we need to be able to do both, focus on things we need to forgive ourselves for and things we need to forgive others for. The best example of this perplexing problem is someone who has been physically or sexually abused as a child and this leads to them to doing this to children themselves. Maybe you have not done this but you have made foolish possibly even egregous mistakes in the past which might have even caused a tragedy. If we can’t accept responsibility for what we did and then forgive ourselves, this will stand in the way of truly being able to forgive someone else for what they have done to us.
No one is perfect or we wouldn’t be here. Whether you believe in original sin or not.
Do you have your own bragging rights? I’ve been afraid to have them. The higher up you go, the farther you can fall. That’s what I have always been told. “The meek will inherit the earth,” is another one. How about, “Be all you can be-in the Army.” If we all live up to our God-given or inborn potential, will there be anything left for anybody else? Potentially we can be or do almost everything if we want to. We may not have the time in this lifetime to do it all. But I would love to be able to pick and choose. Parents say they want their children to do it better and have it better than they have. But aren’t you the parent just a little bit jealous of your own child when this actually happens?
Sometimes the only bragging rights parents have are about their children and grandchildren. Could it be like second hand smoke? Everywhere around you and you can’t help breathing it in; but it does you no good. Parents sometimes work themselves to death in order for their kids to have it better than they did and often the children do not appreciate what has been done for them. Part of the problem has been that very rarely does the child want to do or have the exact same thing that the parent wants. Do it yourself, don’t put everything off or postpone starting your life til after the children are gone. Especially if you have done a lot for your kids, they may still be depending on you when they should be out on their own or worst yet, they expect you to do the exact same thing as you did for them for their kids. Too much is too much and enough is enough.
Alright already. Do your children make plans and share confidences that don’t include you? You know they are having a good time; but you aren’t. Are you missing out on something? Create your own experiences, celebrate your own successes, develop your own tastes and appetite for adventure and success as you see it. Develop your own bragging rights for things that you have or are doing that promote you. Maybe it is not so bad to search for and find your own purpose in life or thrive on your own accomplishments.
Not only should you do something well, you should want to shine at it and you should try to do it better than even you expected. Start now. Don’t wait for an empty nest (or even to be widowed) or it may be too late then. Exercise your bragging rights now especially to yourself by saying all those things you would like to hear. Compliments are made, not born, and may not come easily when applied to oneself. If we fear success and don’t even dare hope that we will do something spectacular, we leave room for others to do what we could do for ourselves. Wives and mothers, do you wait til everyone else’s needs are to take any or do you not assert yourself because, it didn’t matter anyway and it keeps the peace.
Who are you? Have you forgotten? Have you discovered your hidden talents or have not done anything with them because you don’t think you are worth it? or don’t really have any talent as compared to other people you know who have done it?The most highly defended is the greatest asset. That’s why Rocket Risks (Motor Mouth Publishing) are worth it.
Did you ever think about how guilt sidetracks you and keeps you from forgiving yourself? Many people have difficulty forgiving themselves if they feel guilty about something. This can be a tremendous burden to bear and it prevents many people from letting go and moving on. Many people feel that in order to be forgiven that the slate must be wiped clean and the alleged transaction forgotten. If they can’t forgive themselves and forget, why should anybody else forgive them?
For some people to admit that they might have done something wrong destroys their self-esteem and makes them feel valueless. They are their own worst critics and to say that they did something wrong can be self-destructive. Having done a lot of psychotherapy in my life and having been in psychotherapy, the things that are the hardest to admit are the things that we can’t stop feeling guilty about. Often therapy reaches a stumbling block when one of these issues needs to be brought up.
Sometimes people admit that they secretly are their own worst critics. Then it follows that if they beat themselves up about something, that other people should tell them that what they did was not so bad after all. When this isn’t true, therapy often can’t move forwards. The pain of the self-remorse is so great that they feel that no one would ask them to take the next step forward and say that what they did, thought, or said was egregious. They think how can anybody love me if I did that if I can’t forgive and love myself?
What is worst is that sometimes in order unconsciously to prove that what they did was not that bad, they continue to do it. Thereby burying themselves deeper and deeper in the morass of guilt and self-blame. Take sexual harassment for example, the person involved can’t conceive of themself as a careless cad so they don’t change their behavior. It was just a joke or something that all girls ask for by their behavior or form of dress. They don’t realize that the buck stops with themselves no matter who the other person is or what the other person does. Anyway it is just their perception of the other person that they are responding to and it may actually be schewed.
There is no one here on earth (except Christ, who is here only in spirit, but not in the flesh like the rest of us) who is blameless and self-sacrificing. Mother Teresa admitted to faults and she was always working on them. I am sure Pope Francis would say something much the same.
The key to changing this behavior is forgiving yourself and once this is done the repetition compulsion loses it’s steam. This also makes it easier to forgive others when you realize that in some ways you are no different from them. In Christianity, God offers forgiveness for people’s sins but often people don’t accept it because that would involve admitting that they really did something wrong. Forgiveness is free; accepting it is personal choice.
How do you picture other people in your life? Are they 100%? If you are 100% then more then likely they are 100% too.
I was looking for a way to say that all people are equal in the Supreme Being‘s eyes and if we love ourselves, we love others too. In find it difficult to say I love you to everybody; but I found that I could say, “You are 100%.”
My next step will be to say, “You are worthy of love.” What motivates you in your behavior is often the fact that you don’t feel loved and you feel that you have to hurt others in retaliation for this.
What horrible things we do because we do not really love ourselves. Think of all the not so random shootings and vehicular violence that occurs. We all want to be loved and accepted.
Missing the love and respect of just one parent can damage a person irrevocably and result in retalitory violence against his or her spouse and children and against the world in general. How many people have grown up with angry parents who take their anger out on their children?
How can a parent give a child the necessary unconditional love when they did not get it themselves? How much of a child’s behavior is motivated by a desire to be loved and accepted? Gang membership is often used as a way to do this.
So let’s make a start and just say in our heads to everyone we meet, “You are 100%.”
What rules do I have for being a better person? I answered this question in a post of another website. Some are easily remembered and others I often am only reminded of when I do not follow them.
Rules To Become A Better Person:
Don’t pass judgments on others. This means too that I will keep a rein on any criticizing. As the Bible says, “Let him who is without sin, cast the first stone.”
To forgive all wrongs that have been done to me and in doing so practice extreme forgiveness. Not to hold a grudge. Not to carry resentments against others. Going even further this means forgiving every person whose behavior I have let effect negatively me in some way even going so far as to forgive radical terrorists.
Ask that what happens be not just for my own good but also for the good of others.
To work on keeping the word, “should”, out of my vocabulary. That is more for my own good than the good of others.
Keeping a good attitude towards life. Expecting the best instead of the worst.
To keep the amount of worrying that I do down to a minimum. If I must think about potential problem, let it be in order to plan ahead.
To constantly wish for the best for others (and for myself and my loved ones).
To remember humans are not God’s only creations and to treat those in the animal, plant, and also the mineral kingdom like I would like to be treated.
To rejoice in the blessings that others receive and to be happy for them.
To put the best construction on everything. That is to not always assign evil motives to others’ actions.
Not to let fear or anger take over my life and determine what I do and say. Going even further, to not let fear paralyze me or anger turn into murderous rage.
To routinely meditate and practice having a quiet, peaceful mind.
Along with meditation, to keep an open mind and to never stop learning. You will never know what you might discover. Don’t limit yourself to studying under one teacher or mastering one spiritual discipline.
To love others as I love myself. To bless all who I come in contact with and all who inhabit this place with me.
To love myself first and foremost and if I love myself, I will follow these rules.
To respect myself. In order to do this, I need to act, think, and be that which I inwardly and spiritually need to be.
To practice self-discipline in everything I do since I am the only one responsible for my life and what I accomplish.
In other words, if I were God, what would I like for me to be? With God, all things are possible; alone, I am only an imperfect being.
I have not been extremely pithy in doing this; but I will continue to think about this and revise my list as necessary. I am not being God, I am just being what God wants me to be and it is the best thing for me. Stay with me on my journey to self-realization and see if I can help you with yours.
To love, respect, and honor children and (don’t forget) adolescents as well.
Above all, don’t deliberately lie whether by omission or commission especially to yourself, your significant other, and your children when older and your parents when younger.
To not categorize people, whether by age, sexuality, cultural background, financial status, political or religious beliefs or by the judgments of others. I made it a point in school to not absolutely accept the judgments of teachers by what other people said. I often found somebody’s difficult professor was a good one for me. Also when I do put people in categories, I often am drawn into a situation where I have intimate contact with someone I categorized negatively.
Be discriminating when necessary, but not judgmental.
To consider that we all are equally loved and accepted in the eyes of God and we all have equal potential to be able to live up to what God expects of us.
Can you cope with life? Can you understand why things happen in life? Can you feel that your life is complete? without a belief in God. Can science and/or philosophy explain everything for you? Are you able to make it through life and face the apparent oblivion of death without having the reassuring belief of life after death.? Are you content with what you can attain in this life without having another life to look forward to?
Is it just because you are weak that you can’t face reality without the solace of religion? Are you delusional or indulging in magical thinking if you believe in miracles like being raised from the dead? Is that all there is and religious people are just not facing up to reality. Should people take what they can get and live one day at a time enjoying what they have now and not what they might get in a heavenly future?
Believe it or not? Science may validate religious concepts such as prayer, Heaven, or the devil. Actually it has already started. Look up the book, “Measuring the Immeasureable”, a collection of scientific studies which were done in order to verify if such things do work or do not work. (Published 2008, Sounds True publishers.)