Discover our App

Centerpointe Research

Monthly Archives: August 2021

Facial Expressions Mean Something Unless They Are Covered Up

A recent doctor’s or rather Nurse Practitioner’s visit did not go as well as have been expected because the nurse practitioner wore a face mask and a plastic shield over the top of it. It was difficult to impossible to tell what emphasis she put on things that she said. The last thing she said was the emergency room. Was it that I should have gone there instead of making a second convenient care visit or that I should go there next time instead of coming there. This became more confusing when I woke up in the night after going to convenient care the second time with coughing,, upper chest pain (new to me), and I couldn’t stop coughing.. I feel that her emphasis could have been clearer without all that stuff covering her face. It made the medical visit seem more generic than personal.

What does these type of coverings in the schoolroom do to confuse the student’s understanding of what the teacher is trying to say and on the school does a child really mean to stop another child from doing something or are they just telling the other child to not be so strong. Could a child just be joking? or could a child really mean what they are trying to say? Social mores are things that children learn in school and masks get in the way of this. Teasing when misunderstood can cause trouble. If you don’t understand what the other person or child is trying to imply you can at the very least get confused or at the worst get into a fight.

Current regulations about wearing masks in school do not seem to take this into account. A teacher can raise an eyebrow, twinkle an eye, grit her teeth, and might not be seen. The same can be true of children in the classroom. Smiles can be lost. Words can be misunderstood when muffled by the masks. Zoom classes can make three-dimensional things one-dimensional. Instead of child psychologists, well-experienced teachers’ decisions about mask-wearing or made by school boards, governors, some doctors, usually people with no regular classroom experience.

Governments are set up to have local decisions made by local people.  Even voting requirements are set up to be made by the state, not federal governments.  We have teachers’ unions from the top down doing this.  Where are the children in this equation?  Aren’t the children’s requirements the most important part of the equation?  Where is the children’s union?  What pull do children have in this equation?  They are not learning social skills.  Teachers are not conveying the total meaning of what they are saying.  A wink of an eye can convey to a student not to take a teacher seriously especially if accompanied by a change in the tone of voice.  What do masks and face shields do when covering a teacher’s face or a child’s face.  It can be very confusing.

Then there are the doctor’s contributions to this controversy.  What experience and education do the doctors have in this particular area.  Opinions can just be opinions with little or no facts or logical conclusions to back them up.  Doctors should be cautious in making these opinions.  Pediatricians may have more to weigh in on these problems than general doctors.  Those with research backgrounds should have covered research in this particular area/  Psychologists, school psychologists should have been researchers in this area and should be well acquainted with the research in this area.  Clinical psychologists, child psychiatrists all may have knowledge in this area.  Parents actually may know about what has affected their child’s behavior and performance in school after masking.

Decisions such as these about masking must be made very carefully because any mistakes that are made can have long-term consequences for social development and learning.

Blaming Your Shopping Addiction On Anyone But Yourself Is Not Cool

It is difficult to almost impossible to blame your shopping addiction on anyone but yourself and cure it.   The blame and shame that goes with admitting you have a shopping addiction are difficult to deal with. This is especially true if you have a long history of doing this. It is no longer a mistake when you have run-up credit card debt and have acquired clothes and jewelry that you have no place for, or, worse yet, have not ever worn. This can lead (even worse yet) to hoarding and having stuff piled on top of stuff. You can see how this can go on. Worst yet you begin to realize the things that you could have had like trips, education, or different vehicles if you had not spent your money on this stuff.

Once you realize this you can become shameful and you can’t admit the truth to anybody. This attitude makes a twelve-step group difficult to go to as there are several steps that involving opening up to others and not holding stuff in. Your reaction to these steps can be either shame or its opposite anger. Another problem with a shopping addiction is pride. Opening up can lead to blaming others instead of yourself. Or if you have piled up debt so deep that you feel horrible about all the money you wasted. and thus about yourself.

Having a sponsor in a twelve-step group can be very helpful with opening up as they have gone through the same thing and its negative emotions. It is easier to share your losses with someone who can be sympathetic and not shame you.  Revealing that you have backslid and have done the same thing as well as indebting yourself over and over is easier to do with someone who has done this too.  Family members and friends may find it difficult to listen to you because it is difficult for them to you without shaming you and blaming you for doing such things over and over.

Hearing other’s stories can reveal that it is possible to go through running up debt and then trying to pay it off and then running up more debt with flimsy excuses like it was on sale or I had to go on that trip.  Also, there are some success stories that don’t involve following in the debt trap again involving paying off debt, not impulse buying, and paying off extensive debt over time.  There also are pressure relief groups in Debtors Anonymous to help deal with immediate pressing problems like bounced checks that might lead to jail time.

And last, of all like all twelve-step groups, there is a reliance on a higher power to get the strength to open up and make changes.  The higher power does not have to be God, it can be something else but it helps participants to get the strength to make changes.  Most participants know that relying only on themselves doesn’t work.

To learn about twelve-step programs for debtors look up Debtors Anonymous.  Some areas do not have local groups but do offer meetings by phone.  There are also books like Twelve Steps And Twelve Traditions available that explain how the program works.