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Being Grateful to Those You May Hate

We get so upset about “bad” things people have done to us in our past that we totally ignore the good things they did.  Most relationships can not be all bad, but we prefer sometimes to see them that way when they end.

Make a list of good things your exspouse, exfriend or  “abusive” parent did for you.  Look at it when you are grumpy and can only think of the things they did that you consider bad.  This is not to overlook dangerous things that happened because of  these people or things someone did for you just to ingratiate you so that you wouldn’t refuse to do something for them.

Be appreciative.  There usually has been a time when things were going good or you wouldn’t have been in a relationship with them.  Just think if the relationship hadn’t ended or if you had had a chance to talk openly with your parent before you lost him or her, you might be counting your blessings.

Good memories can be about simple things:  putting butter and sugar on plain white bread for a treat, having gotten a beloved pet together, doing chores together and the other person 0pting to do a chore that you extremely disliked.

Seeking revenge and focusing on what the other person did wrong can only make you unhappy as you relive bad memories.

If you refocus on these types of relationships and try to at least mentally mend fences, you may work out some of your karma with these people in this lifetime instead of the next (if you believe in reincarnation).

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