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Can We Spot Our Own Lies?


Truth (Photo credit: d4vidbruce)

Often we are aware when we tell someone else a lie.  Signs of omission are harder to spot in oneself.  It happens when you should tell somebody something that you know is the truth but are unwilling or afraid to share.  Someone asks us for a favor, but we don’t say , “No,” but we don’t say , “Yes,” either.  Then later, the person asks us when we are going to do them a favor and we have to tell them, “No.”  We just put off saying what we should have said when we were first asked to do something and that is that we aren’t able to fulfill that request for them.  Sometimes we hope that by avoiding answering the question that the other person will get the hint that we don’t want to do it and not press us to give them a deliberate, “No.”  An unfortunate possible consequence is that the person making the request doesn’t look else for someone else to do the favor and is up the crick without a paddle by the time they realize you won’t do it.

The biggest problem with the truth is when you don’t tell yourself the truth.  Sometimes we lie to ourselves, for example, by telling ourselves we don’t have a problem with something when we do.  This is often true of alcoholics or people with drug addictions.  When we don’t see a problem, we can’t solve it.  Also possible clues about what might be causing the problem are not part of the picture as acknowledging them might suggest that we do something about them.

Sharing the truth can be a life changing experience especially when done relationships like the therapist-patient one either one-on-one or in groups.

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