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In Sync

How do sociable people do it?  That is get in sync with the person or persons that they are talking to about something.

Give your full attention.  Don’t text, don’t leave your cell phone on, don’t look around the room or at someone else.  Some people just need to be heard, really heard even if you can not give them a solution.

Person using cell phone while driving.

Person using cell phone while driving. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Doing these sort of things saves you time in the long run if you are that sort of person.  It is very clear with children that you must pay attention to what they are showing you or telling you.  Acting like you are doing this and thinking about something else doesn’t work.

You can give the impression to people that they are not worth your time and effort.  When you do something, do it right the first time or you are wasting your time and effort as well as the other person’s.

Reschedule the conversation for some  time when you can talk without being distracted.  You don’t have to be rude if you really can’t talk.  Just say, “It’s not you but I am late for an appointment.  Can we do this later?”

When you do meet with the intent to talk to someone, follow these tips:

Mirror what the other person does or says.  That’s how you can get in sync with them.

They may not notice it but if you have similar postures or gestures or use the same words, they will be more comfortable with you and might become more open to what you have to say.

People also have a tendency to prefer one sense over the other when they are talking about something.  “I can see what you are saying.  I have often felt that way.  Hear me out.”  Use their preferred sensory modality in your replies to become more in tune with them.

Letting them know that you understand how they feel or you have gotten the point that they are making.


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4 Responses to In Sync

  • This is in the range of what Schneider describes
    as “catabolic” energy. If all else fails, curl up and watch some Sesame Street.
    You have a sense of an infinite source that will
    always provide.

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    Am putting this into book form and I have over 600 posts to choose from.

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