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Centerpointe Research

Me? Forgive You?

Miracle of Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a process undertaken by the person who has been “wronged.”  It may stop or stall anywhere along the way.  In most cases, the person being forgiven has little or no say about it.  The person who has the power to forgive is the victim and the person who benefits from the act of forgiving is  also really the victim.  Forgiveness releases energy for the victim which was being consumed by the anger, often even the hate, felt toward the perpetrator.  Grief is also often part of the sequence of events involved in forgiving someone; because something or someone is usually lost.  Grieving takes time and is said to have five stages which are not necessarily gone through sequentially and any stage may be gone through more than once. They are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.  Some people say that they can forgive, but they can’t forget what was lost.  Holding on to and reliving the memory in a sense is giving the perpetrator another chance to hurt you.  True healing is not accomplished in most cases unless forgiveness is given.  This is one of the hardest things to do.; but it signals the end of the healing process.

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