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Upset

Reading Other People’s Minds

English: A simple pizza slicer.

English: A simple pizza slicer. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Reading minds is it an acquired skill?  Don’t get started reading other people’s minds for them; because then they always expect you to do it.  This got started when I tried to avoid other peoples’ drama.  I think my mother taught me how and then she reinforced it by getting upset when I missed the mark.

Here’s an example of having to read minds, someone in my house can’t find a pizza cutter so they use a dull knife.  That person gets upset with me and the utensil drawer and is going to throw half the stuff in there out (someday when they get around to it).  I didn’t find out until later that they had not looked in the silverware drawer where I found it.  (I indiscriminately often use both drawers for such stuff.)  Then he told me that he didn’t want the small cutter which I had found for him and that he wanted the big one.  Needless to say, I had put that one was in the dishwasher when I partially loaded it earlier and which he had just finished loading and had turned on.  Now what is the message?  That I should have finished loading the dishwasher and ran it before he came home? and  taken care of putting the pizza in the oven and then of course, it would have also been my job to cut it and bring it to him.

If I don’t read someone’s mind correctly, is it terrible if I make someone else upset?  Who is going to consider my feelings?  Whenever it is a lost and found situation, it is always my fault and, of course, I should apologize and immediately go find whatever is lost.  The lost thing is not usually not lost when I go to find it.  Help?

I usually lose at reading people’s minds.  How can such a simple problem become such a big thing? Ordinarily I try to go with the flow.  I usually do not make it 100% certain that things should go my way.  It is easier to not make a big fuss, especially if there is
more than one person involved and everyone is jostling for position.
What is this thing about having to be the winner and the winner takes
all.  The other person is not always right; but he or she finds it
difficult to admit it.

 

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Getting Upset Over Something

loveyouradultchildrenGetting upset over something sometimes means you have a tender heart.  I see you getting upset over something and it breaks my heart.  No, I am not upset over what upset you for what could I do to keep that from happening to you?  Getting upset over something small seems to be your fate and when I get involved, it seems to be too late.

Getting upset over something that happens to you seems to be my problem too.  I don’t want to see you hurt and what hurts you hurts me.  The first time it happened (or when it first happened in a big way) it ruined my day.  I cried with you and sobbed my heart out.  It was terrible that I couldn’t do anything to mend your heart on my part.

When you (the keeper of my heart) get upset over something about which you can do nothing and which was not really your fault at the start, it is harder to do something about it as you never had control to start with. You can do little, if anything, about it now.  You are upset when someone does something for you and it doesn’t work out and you know there is no way you can fix it after the fact.  I feel bad for you and here I am getting upset over something that I didn’t cause in the first place just like you and I can’t fix it either.  Getting upset over something is easy to do and harder to fix when it is not you.

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