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What to Do with Feelings

English: Managing emotions - Identifying feelings

English: Managing emotions - Identifying feelings (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Have you been told that you create your own feelings and that sometimes they are irrational?  What’s next?  If you  can not deny them, what can you do with them?  I have had some experience with Externalization which is associated with Dr, Elizabeth Kubler-Ross (who is also associated with the death and dying movement).  In Externalization, you can perform some sort of action in a safe environment (with also at least one facilitator who is trained in Externalization) and express your feelings. Tearing up phone books or beating a pillow with a rubber hose (while sitting or lying on a mattress) are two ways to work on  angry feelings.  Crying into a pillow is a way to express sad feelings.

Part of what Dr. Kuber-Ross has said is basically that  feelings are contagious.  If a person has an emotional reaction to some other person’s acting out their feelings, it is because he or she has an unresolved issue on which he or she needs to work.  The person working on their feelings is in the middle of a group of people who are all there to observe and the people observing are not supposed to comment on the work being done by the person in the middle.   Facilitators observe and notice those who need to work on their own feelings which have been aroused by observing the person in the center of the group working and use this information to determine who needs to do work next.  They are there to counsel people outside the group  versus inside the group  and  also to take emergency action if necessary.  The facilitators also might select them as the next  person to work on their feelings in the middle of the group.  . This is not a complete overview of every thing about  Externalization and the Externalization process.

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