How Do You Let Them Treat You That Way?

Think back to the last time you really watched how the people around you behave toward you. Not reacting, just watching. When someone walks through the door, or when you walk through theirs, what comes out of their mouth first? Probably not "Did you have a good day?" Though maybe it was, and good for you if so. Often it's nothing. If you hadn't happened to spot them arriving, you'd have no idea they were in the house. You might as well be furniture.

So the question stands: why do you allow it? Has your sense of your own worth sunk down to the floorboards? Maybe you've become the person nobody registers unless the paycheck stops landing in the bank account. Maybe you get measured against someone else, always coming up short in the comparison. And when they get a laugh out of ranking you below that other person, and you don't join in, suddenly you're the one with no sense of humor who can't take a joke.

We're taught that staying modest is a fine quality. Lower yourself, let everyone else go first. Swallow that whole, believe every bit of it, and you've handed people the exact permission they needed to keep treating you like this. Nobody ever became someone by folding themselves into the smallest possible shape. Shine instead. Pay attention to the people around you and watch them start paying attention back. Say something good about your own work. Tell people what you've been up to.

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